worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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