Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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