the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
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