would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
