I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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