Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
