apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
