38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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