Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
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