But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
