Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
