the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
