honey bunches of taint.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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