meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Randomize
