I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
