the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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