marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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