she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
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