I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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