so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
At least life still wants to fuck me.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
