sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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