I bet he comes in French.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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