party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
