I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize