Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize