i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize