Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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