ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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