youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
