Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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