all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
