I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
