is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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