a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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