yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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