Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Randomize
