Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
