i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
sarcasm needs its own font
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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