No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
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