singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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