i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
