I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
