5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
