oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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