Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
