nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
