shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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