Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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