i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
