dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
