I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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